Caught between two lovers!

Our Dreamer Writes:

Dear SMYD,

I’ve changed the names in this dream in case my new boyfriend happens to read your column.  I don’t want to make things any worse than they are! 

I’m in a relationship now with Frank, and I’m pretty sure he’s the one for me.  But when we first got together he kept bugging me with questions, so I gave in and made the mistake of telling him about my ex, Jim.  Now Frank seems preoccupied with my past, and I’m beginning to wonder about the whole deal! 

Then last night I dreamed that I was sleeping in bed and Jim, my ex, was sleeping next to me.  I turned over to find that Frank was sleeping next to me on the other side!  After turning back and forth I was really worried about what to do.

So I woke Jim up to get him to slip out before Frank wakes up and discovers him.  But Frank does wake up and begins complaining about Jim being there!  I am very upset and afraid that Frank’s going to start a fistfight with Jim (something he’d never really do because Jim is much bigger and stronger).  That’s when I woke up feeling very upset. 

This dream’s trying to tell me something, but I don’t know what! 

Signed,

Caught Between Two Lovers

Dear Caught,

While our dreams are often metaphorical and confusing, speaking to us with complex images and bizarre activities, they sometimes just tell it like it is! 

Your dream seems to fall into the latter category, stating in very direct terms the dilemma you face:  In effect, you’ve taken your ex, Jim, to bed with you and Frank by talking about him in too much detail.  Now Frank is worried about comparisons between himself and Jim.  He brought them upon himself of course, with his relentless questions.  And perhaps his insecurities prompted you to turn and have another look at Jim yourself. 

It’s interesting to think that Frank may have inadvertently created the very circumstance he dreads ~ he bugged you with so many questions about Jim that you began thinking of Jim and making the very comparisons Frank hoped to avoid.  Your dream reflects this with your turning back and forth between them.

You say that if it came to a physical showdown Jim would win.  Perhaps he’d win in any case.  You don’t mention if Jim is still on the periphery of your life, but it doesn’t matter.  You say you’re only ‘pretty sure’ Frank’s the one for you.  And your dream confirms your mind’s not made up in favor of either of these two men.  After all, you don’t order Jim out of the room, you tell him to slip out as though to protect him.  You even protect yourself a bit since you don’t want Frank to know Jim’s there. 

Don’t make commitments when you’re on soft ground, Dear Dreamer!  Starting a new relationship before the old one’s finished creates strange bedfellows.

Sweet Dreams to You!