Fire breathing dragon consumes dreamer

Out of this world action and a play on words highlight today’s dream, offering insights for a young dreamer struggling with growing up and separating from his family.

Dear SMYD,

This qualifies as the weirdest dream I’ve ever had!

It was New Year’s Eve.  I was spending time with family in Las Vegas like we always do.  Then I told them that I have to get back to my place in LA.  

When I was in LA, it was still as bright as noon even though it was 1am.  Everyone looked up in the sky and was wondering why it was so bright.  It was because of this massive spacecraft!  

I was trying to leave the center of downtown LA, but for some reason it felt enchanted and I was unable to do so.  The spacecraft hovered around and the whole city turned dark.  It landed right on the sidewall of a huge building and showed its real form.  It was a dragon!  

It turned its head toward my direction and breathed out fire.  I just closed my eyes as I was being engulfed by the flames.  Then I woke up.  Scary!

Wonder what it means. 

Signed,

Scared by a Dragon

Dear Scared,

Your dream has many elements that offer clues to its significance for you.  As a start, your dream is set on New Year’s Eve, a time of resolutions and new beginnings; a time for reviewing the past and looking to the future.  In your dream, this is when you seem to be restless and make an unexpected break from your family.  You tell them you’re leaving the tradition of spending time in the way you always have.  You are going to your own home in LA.

You probably recognize the break with tradition you’ve made, at least mentally if not physically.  You've broken away from the routine.  Maybe you've had a change of heart or disagreement with them on some point.  Even though this is the normal order of things, for a young man to strike out on his own, this causes upset and discomfort for your family and for you.  Whatever it is, it’s as plain as day as shown by the bright daytime light in the middle of the night.  It’s obvious, and cannot be denied.

Your dream depicts the change as something "off the wall," ~ something odd or unusual ~ something unexpected (from outer space), nothing that you would expect to be doing or thinking or involved in, yet there it is.  It turns toward you and gives you a baptism by fire.  You are a changed man!

The scary thing for you is the idea that the new way of thinking, or the change of opinion will consume you, or burn you up, change your life so you cannot go back.  But you cannot un-ring the bell, Dear Dreamer.  You’ve made the move to be your own man, now go on and live your own life.

Sweet Dreams to You!

SMYD

sendmeyourdreams@yahoo.com          

Spiders in my dreams!

Sometimes the best place to start with understanding a dream is with its most vibrant image.  The spiders are the starting place in today’s dream, hands down!

Dear Carolyn,

I’ve had two dreams, back-to-back, about spiders!

First, I am looking for a place to live.  I am walking past a house but I see a spider web so I walk up the walk to see it better.  This is an enormous web - bigger than the doorway - and there are a lot of spiders.  The spiders are big too, about the size of a dinner plate and their eyes are so big.  I can see them watching me.  The web is very beautiful and intricate.  I do not fear the spiders; in fact I can sense they are afraid of me, so I don't want to stay because I am scaring them.  So, I walk off looking for a house that’s available.

Then last night’s dream:

I cannot remember how I got the spider, but I am trying to keep it in a Tupperware container.  Again, a big spider.  It is beige looking and has a hard body like an orb spider - or like a crab I guess - but is a spider.  I am at "school" and I am putting different material in the box to make the spider comfy.  I put some rocks in and then I am worried that they might hurt him.  So I am taking them out and putting other materials in there.  The spider keeps trying to get away; and I do not want him to get away.  I have no fear of the spider, just trying to make it comfortable and I just carry the box around school.

Signed,

Spiders in My Dreams!

Dear Spiders,

Your dreams seem to be speaking about a protective barrier represented by the spiders.  

In the first dream, contrary to many people’ reactions, you are drawn to the barrier established by the spiders’ web, calling it beautiful and intricate.  You even take steps to avoid disturbing the spiders, keeping the barrier in place.  You say you’re scaring them, but the fear of crossing that threshold is yours, Dear Dreamer! 

The spider barrier is that part of you that watches carefully, maybe not threatening, but nevertheless, restrictive and uninviting.  The spiders, like you, watch anyone approaching their door cautiously, even suspiciously.  Dear Dreamer, that caution and suspicion render the house (and you) unavailable. 

In the second dream, you carry around a spider, pampering it, trying to make it comfortable, worrying that it will escape.  But it wants to escape, suggesting you'd like to let it go.

On one hand you'd like to keep up the barrier, but that means living with hard things ~ the rocks~ (a hard heart?  a hard exterior?).  But on the other hand you have the fear of releasing the protection you think you need. 

It’s set in a school Dear Dreamer.  What have you learned from nurturing this defensive obstacle?

Sweet Dreams to You!

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Lost the babies!?!

Our dreams will sometimes play out an emotion or pattern of thinking we haven’t acknowledged on the waking level.  These dreams can be anxiety-laden and will recur if we push them out of consciousness because of our fears.  Today’s dream offers a perfect example of this.

Dear SMYD,

My wife and I have been happily married for almost five years.  The only thing missing in our marriage is children.  I’ve always wanted to be a dad! 

We tried to get pregnant for so long, we were beginning to think we’d have to go to extraordinary measures to have a child.  But as I’ve learned these things sometimes go, just as we made the first appointment with a fertility specialist, Bingo! my wife became pregnant!  

What a great, long-overdue surprise.  But that’s not all:  We’re having triplets!  No outside help!  They’re going to arrive in about six weeks and now I’ve had this scary dream:

I am in Target with our new babies.  I have them to myself.  My wife is not around.  It doesn’t seem like I even look away, but somehow, the babies are gone.  Missing!  I search frantically for them, find them; and they’re happy and fine.  And then they are missing again!  The dream just seems to repeat this same sequence, each time I am relieved, proud to be a dad, and then scared to death and filled with panic when the babies disappear!

I’ve been the protector and caretaker during this entire stressful process and now I’ve had this dream that has me being so careless!  I somehow lose our babies.  Please, say it ain’t so!

Signed,

Lost the Babies!

Dear Lost,

Put your mind to rest, Dear Dreamer!  It ain’t so!  You are not going to lose your babies in Target!  Your dream is simply playing out that subterranean part of yourself that’s understandably afraid of not being a perfect father. 

Think of it – with this pregnancy, everything in your life has fallen into place.  It’s all on target, you might say.  The only thing you’ve yearned for is now yours.

Every new parent is worried about how they will do in the most demanding and important role of all.  And, you have the unexpected blessing/surprise that not just one new baby is on the way, but three!  It’s really no wonder that both you and your wife would be anxious about that!

On top of the normal stress of impending fatherhood, you’ve been keeping a stiff upper lip for your wife, not allowing your fears to show and add to hers.  But you might as well acknowledge it, Dear Dreamer.  You’re normal and it’s normal to be worried about losing your babies in a discount store!  Or misplacing them at the mall.  Or forgetting them in the car. 

Your dream simply tells you that you’ll make mistakes, but barring true negligence, which is not in your nature, you’ll find your babies to be happy and fine.

You’ll be a great dad, Dear Dreamer!  Sweet Dreams to You!

SMYD

sendmeyourdreams@yahoo.com

Oh yes you DO dream!

Dearest Dreamers,

A friend told me recently she never dreamed!  We had to lay that misconception to rest immediately:  Every one dreams every night!  Now, it’s true that not all of us remember our dreams.  Some say they don’t even recall a snippet of a dream, ever.  It’s hard for me to imagine!  I always feel a little sad for those who don’t wake with an image of any kind.  Even if a person isn’t interested in learning about her dreams, just think of the entertainment she’s missing! 

Research shows that if a person is sleep-deprived, and therefore dream-deprived, she will suffer multiple effects ~ everything from irritability all the way to hallucination ~ almost as if her dreams begin spilling into her waking consciousness.  That can cause some real problems!

My friend asked for a means to begin remembering her dreams.  It’s not difficult to get started.  If you want to start calling your dreams to mind, take these few steps: 

1)      Follow a consistent routine as you prepare to sleep.  This alerts your physical self and your Dreaming Self to anticipate the night’s adventure. 

2)      Avoid alcohol and drugs if possible.  Of course, follow your doctor’s orders!

3)      Keep a notepad and pen at your bedside.  Some dreamers use a recording device.

4)      When you wake, don’t move!  Evidence suggests that dreams produce muscle memory, so the more you move about, the more of your dream you’ll be “erasing.”  Stay still for a bit and allow some reverie.

5)      Write down even the tiniest glimpse of a dream.  Nothing is too small!  Remember, a fragment of a dream may be a story or scene, but it can also be a voice, music, an emotion or an image.  Some even report a written phrase.

As though following your waking intentions, your Dreaming Self will most certainly reward you.

My forgetful friend fussed with the steps over a period of time, trying to get everything just perfect.  She was so determined to remember a dream that she hardly slept, and sometimes woke with her teeth clenched and a stiff neck!  She’d almost given up, but added a cup of Chamomile tea to her nightly routine and voila!  

Here is her first memory of a dream after following her routine:

I dreamed I bought a mailbox.  I shopped thoroughly and carefully until I found a sturdy one.  It was painted eggshell white.

That’s it!  Beautiful in its power and simplicity, isn’t it?  As though shopping thoroughly and carefully, she had worked diligently to get everything just right, to establish a method for receiving missives from her Dreaming Self:  A mailbox!  Of course!  What better metaphor for anticipation of her nightly travels and readiness to remember them?

But don’t forget the last detail ~ her mailbox isn’t just white, it is eggshell white.  Like an egg, bearing new life, this vessel will deliver her dreams! 

She has tapped a deep source of wonder, intuition, insight and growth.  Just lovely!   

Sweet Dreams to You, Dear Dreamers!

Quit drinking ~ THEN hit rock bottom!

Look to the emotions that come with your dreams for insights into the “take away” message they offer.  Be sure to stay with your dream long enough to recognize all the feelings it highlights.  Consider today’s example:

Dear SMYD,

It wasn’t hitting rock bottom exactly, but I had a big scare at work that finally made me change my ways.  I’ve been working for many years in a professional setting doing work that I love.  I’ve had a great reputation.  I’m very good at what I do!  But, while I never admitted it out loud, I knew that my drinking was beginning to affect my performance.  I guess I was hung over more often than I’d like to admit and I started to forget things and make mistakes in critical situations.  I began to have conflicts with my peers and even my boss!  After a poor performance review threatening demotion and even dismissal, I checked myself into rehab.

Now I am a sober person physically and psychologically.  I feel certain that I can and will remain on the straight and narrow.  But now I’ve had this terrible dream:

In the follow up meeting after the first bad review, I’m told that I am to be demoted and my salary cut in half!  I feel desperate and panicky.  I begin to scramble, running out scenarios as to how I can survive under these circumstances.  I consider everything from getting a second job to selling my furniture and my house.  I calculate my finances repeatedly, finally seeing that I can eke out a living.  As everything settles into place, I wake up with a sense of relief.

Signed,

Scared of the Bottom

Dear Scared,

If we step back and look at your dream from the “big picture” perspective, it contains very good news:  When faced with dire consequences of your poor performance review, you ran out multiple scenarios, none of which included taking a drink to relieve your stress.  Instead, you took a hard look at what you were faced with, assessed the facts, and thought through the possibilities that lay before you.  In fact, Dear Dreamer, you could say that you had a sober look at your circumstances. 

Now consider the emotions of your dream:  Given a stunning reduction in your means, you felt extreme emotional distress: panic and desperation.  But you turned only to your assets to determine how you would proceed.  That is a powerful metaphor for your new, sober mode of dealing with stress!  You must take pride and comfort in this!

And, just as important, you woke up with a sense of relief.  Relief that you could survive even if dealt some harsh news.  This also reflects the strength of your new resolve. 

You have done remarkable work to change your life Dear Dreamer!  While initially unsettling, your dream in fact offers assurances that you can do whatever you need to do without even thinking of going back to the downward path!  So very good for you!

Sweet Dreams to You!

SMYD