Faking Injury Backfires for this Dreamer

Our Dreamer Writes:

Dear SMYD,

Two kids, a husband and invalid mother-in-law is more than one person should have to manage on her own!  Truthfully, I don’t have more to do than I can do.  Some days I actually feel like I’m a Superwoman.  But it bugs me that my family takes advantage.  They act like they don’t even see what’s going on.  I’m the only one who ever does anything around here!  That’s how I was feeling before this dream:

First, I was chasing a bunch of ferrets.  They were running every direction and I felt ridiculous.  Every time I got them rounded up, they were out again and I had to start all over. 

Then, I was behind the wheel of the car and I just slammed on the brakes.  When I did, the door flew open.  I fell out of the car onto the ground.  I wasn’t hurt, but I laid there and kind of pretended I was.  I kept peeking out of one eye to see if anyone would notice or come over to check on me.  Sure enough, my husband and some other people came and stood over me, looking down at me, but saying and doing nothing.  My kids were there too, just looking at me.  And my friend Kim, the smartest, strongest, most self-sufficient of my friends was there.  But she also just stood there looking at me and said, “Are you going to get up from there or what?”

What does it take to get some help around here?!

Signed,

Tired of Doing It All

 

Dear Tired One,

A key to your dream comes in the form of your pretense.  No one can argue that you are in a difficult situation with many people depending on you.  It may be a lot to manage, but by your own accounting it’s not too much for you.  You seem proud of what you accomplish, even calling yourself Superwoman.  Yet you pretend to be in distress.  Why?

In your dream you successfully corral the ferrets (manage the lively and diverse tasks at hand) and repeat the process each day.  But when you put on the brakes and fall to the ground, you seem to be looking for attention, or maybe credit or accolades for all you’re doing.  Have you asked anyone for help, or should they be reading your mind?

Kim, that strong, self-sufficient part of yourself is unimpressed with your display.  She reminds you that crying ‘wolf’ doesn’t fool anyone.  You can handle the jobs you’ve taken on. 

If you’re truly feeling burdened or resentful that no one appreciates you or steps up to offer assistance, putting on a false show of distress does not bring the response you’re looking for.  Be real.  The best way to get what you need is to ask for it!  Your husband most certainly could help with his mother.  Your kids may be able to contribute as well, depending on their ages.  Speak up for yourself, Dear Dreamer!

Sweet Dreams to You!

SMYD