Dream cautions against wishful thinking

Our Dreamer Writes:

Dear SMYD,

My current boyfriend is the youngest of the three children.  He had two sisters that passed away.  I never met them and only know their names, what caused their deaths and that they passed rather young.  He was close to the middle one and she was 10 years older than he was, but not close at all to the one who is in this dream.  

In my dream I am with my ex-husband.  He was the guy I married, not the guy he was by the time we divorced.  (What I mean by that is he changed so much that he was not the same person I fell in love with or married).  I guess that I might have had thoughts of getting back together with him.  We are talking and he tells me that his addiction is not gone.  We are walking around a city that I don’t recognize and we decide to get something to eat. 

While we are walking to a table he tells me that a woman in the restaurant is my current boyfriend’s sister, who died a long time ago.  I have never met her and I ask him how he knows her.  He says he just knows.  I decide to go to the bathroom so I can walk past her table.  I don’t see her at first; then I see her and ask her if she is my boyfriend’s sister.  She says yes.  I ask her if my boyfriend knows that she is here and she says, “Noooo!”  They are not close.  She tells me I must know something about him and that it is important.  She tells me, but when I wake up, I don’t remember what it was!

I felt anxious because I could not remember what she told me and I felt it was something I should know about him, maybe to understand him better or explain something about him.  I felt sad because the ex in my dream was the person I married.  I realized how much I miss that person.

Please help with this dream! 

Signed,

Nostalgic for my Ex 

Dear Nostalgic,

Your dream reflects your wistful state of mind, and that you may be comparing your current boyfriend to your ex-husband.  Perhaps in your longing, you over-romanticize the early days of your marriage.

Your ex-husband brings you to your boyfriend’s sister saying he “just knows” her.  In turn, she suggests there may be something about your current boyfriend that is similar to your ex-husband.  This is something you "must know," since you know them both.  But it may be something about them both that you're not recognizing or not acknowledging.

It could be something that you don't want to recognize - something bad or unappealing - an addiction, for example.

Or it could be something about your current boyfriend that's like the man you married (not the one you divorced).  Search your heart, Dear Dreamer!  The answer is within.

Sweet Dreams to You!

SMYD