Dreams don't tell white lies

Our Dreamer Writes:

Dear SMYD,

I can’t imagine why I would dream of a girl I knew so long ago.  I’ll call her Carla.  And back when I knew her in junior high school, I didn’t like her that much.  She hung around on the edge of my circle of friends.  She was so insecure that she was annoying, always looking for approval.  I haven’t thought of her in years!

But in my dream I’m talking to Carla in the present.  I notice that she is wearing a wedding ring set exactly like mine.  Mine seems to be newer and shinier than hers is, but otherwise, they’re identical.  We comment on the coincidence, and then she takes out a picture of her husband.  They’re newlyweds and Carla seems very proud and happy.  The photo is of a man with long wavy dark hair parted in the middle.  He has a ‘wandering’ eye that looks off to one side.  One leg of his jeans is cut away to reveal an unhealthy leg; it’s thin, pale and weak looking.  I think I knew this guy at my old job!  He was an oddball and very self-conscious of his appearance.  I’m surprised by the way he looks; but to be polite I tell her he was a nice guy.

How weird!  I never really knew anyone like the guy in her picture.  Why would Carla show up after all this time?  And why would I have someone like her husband in my dream?

Signed,

Back in Junior High School

Dear Junior High,

Appearances play a large role in your dream just as they do for adolescents in junior high school.  Your dream infers this superficial approach to things may be in play in your waking life. 

For example, you say your rings look better than Carla’s do, but in fact the rings are identical.  Her husband’s appearance is surprising and even unpleasant to you, but you put a nice face on your feelings instead of sharing your true thoughts with her. 

What is it in your waking life that parallels this, Dear Dreamer?  Your dream implies that you may be turning away from something disagreeable; telling yourself on the surface it’s really OK to avoid acknowledging the facts at hand. 

I can’t help wondering if you also are a newlywed.  Or perhaps you’re in a brand new relationship of some kind that has you feeling unsure of yourself, maybe even annoyingly so, like your old ‘friend’ Carla.  Have you recently committed to a circumstance that you’re now second-guessing?  Your dream suggests this with the appearance of Carla and your identical rings. 

You tell Carla the white lie that her husband was a nice guy when you actually think of him in an unflattering way – as an unappealing ‘oddball.’  Your dream suggests that you may be lying to yourself in the same way.  Tell yourself the truth, Dear Dreamer!  Ignoring the facts before you can only delay the inevitable.

Sweet Dreams to You, Dear Dreamer!

SMYD

sendmeyourdreams@mail.com