Bad Hair Day

Our Dreamer Writes:

Dear SMYD,

I dreamed I was at the house where I grew up, but all the people there were people from my work.  There were five or six of us.  We all stood and looked in the mirror my mom has mounted over her fireplace.  As I looked from face to face in the reflection, everyone looked pretty much as they actually do, except me.  My hair kept changing colors!  First it was blonde, then red, then black.  It stayed black and then it got all messy and tangled.  Everyone around me just watched.  Then my boss came up and handed me a brush,  then just turned and walked away.

Signed,

Bad Hair at My Mom’s house

Dear Bad Hair,

Our dreams often use the “shape shifting” you’ve described to create metaphors for our states of mind or situations with which we are dealing in waking life.  Your changing hair color is an apt one.

Try thinking of your hair this way:  It comes out of your head – like your thoughts.  In your dream, your thoughts go from blonde (sunny, perhaps), to red (angry, perhaps), to black (really mad, perhaps, or maybe pessimistic).  You may be able to ascribe your own personal emotions to the colors of your thoughts.

It could be that your dream is positing a scenario like this: The way things are done in your workplace (represented by your boss and coworkers) is a reflection of how things were done in your mom’s house.  Because of that, you seem to be feeling progressively worse.  Does this ring a bell?  Did you and your mom butt heads?  Were you simply told to “get over it?”

In your dream, those around you seem unconcerned.  This could add to a feeling of isolation – you’re the only one feeling the way you feel.  And, your boss essentially says, “Get your mind right!” when he hands you a hairbrush, suggesting your smooth out your tangled, pessimistic thoughts.  If this shows how you and your mom interacted when you were a child, no wonder it brings up all those feelings of frustration and anger. 

A possible plan of action emerges:  First, in as diplomatic a manner as you can muster, voice your concerns to your co-workers so that you can feel heard and validated.  If it remains that you are alone in your perceptions, you likely will have to acquiesce to the majority.  The trick is to do this gracefully when your emotions are so high.

Take a deep breath, Dear Dreamer.  Count to ten.  Speak your mind; and be a team player.  They’re not mutually exclusive.

Sweeter Dreams to you next time!