Dream Interpretation: Quit groveling - you're the boss

Whenever a dream seems to “just be about” something you already know, look again.  Careful attention will reveal the next step or a different perspective on what you might first think is simple a rehash of the day’s events.  Today’s dreamer share such an example.

Dear SMYD,

I got into a squabble with a woman I work with, “Linda.”  Actually, I am her boss; she’s my secretary/office manager.  She does a good job in almost every way, but there are a couple of things that she needs to improve:  She’s at least a few minutes late to work every day and her work area is a mess.  Since her area’s the first thing everyone sees when they come into our workplace, this is a problem.  

I love and appreciate her, but I had to confront her with these issues and she took it very personally.  She seemed to think that because we work closely together, have fun and laugh together, that she is exempt from the work standards I have to enforce with everyone.  Anyway, her feelings were hurt and she is not getting over it.  Our workplace and relationship are strained and uncomfortable.

Now I’ve had this dream.  It felt as though Linda and I were conversing with each other just as I have described.  It didn’t seem like a dream at all except that it occurred while I was sleeping!  

Here it is:    I am apologizing to Linda.  It's a tenuous conversation in which I say I'm sure I hurt her.  She seems to accept my apology and I relax, but then she comes around again with angry accusations.  Her acceptance of my apology is superficial.  She seems to want to reconcile, but is not able to yet.  And then the dream starts over and repeats itself.

Signed,

Tired of Feeling Guilty

Dear Tired,

Our dreams do not come just to tell us what we already know.  Your dream has established a context which is easily recognizable – it is about the shift in your relationship with Linda.  But it is not simply repeating or describing that change.  You don’t need your dream to tell you that.  Your dream repeats itself and thereby insists that you review how you and Linda have handled the aftermath.  It shows you in a position of apologizing for doing your job and holding her accountable for hers.  You feel guilty for this – why? 

Your dream shows you that your continual apologies will not alter the circumstances.  Linda will reverse her acceptance and “hold it over you” that you hurt her feelings.  She may forgive you at some point, but as your dream shows, she may not.  Why should she?  She’s in a position of power now that you feel guilty and continually apologize.  That’s the best revenge for someone who needs to improve but won’t admit it.  Linda tries to parlay her friendly relationship with you into a pass for poor performance. 

You’ve done nothing wrong Dear Dreamer.  Move on.

Dream Interpretation - Go ahead! Fly your kite!

Today’s dreamer dreams about his dream of going into business for himself.

Dear SMYD,

I have a good job that meets my needs, but it’s not much fun or very inspiring at all.  I’ve been working on the side creating a small business doing something I love – kite building.  My family calls it my hobby, but it’s more than that to me.  They constantly remind me how difficult starting out on your own can be and how many small businesses fail.  All they ever say is, “Don’t jeopardize your security!”

I’ve been nurturing a relationship with a retailer near my home, hoping to sell my kites in greater quantities.  I’m excited about this and want to make my living this way.  I guess it’s natural that I would dream about kites:

I am with a young boy who has a kite to fly.  His kite is one of those rectangular parachutes with lines from both ends used for maneuvering.  He can take off with this kite; he can fly. 

He does take off, but when he reaches the sky he knocks down another young boy flying in another similar kite.  This young boy is bundled up with braces and a helmet and goggles & protective gear of various kinds.  He looks like he’s going into a hazardous materials spill!

When he falls to the ground there is a crowd of people who are shocked and worried for his well-being.  They are also upset with the young boy who knocked him down and with me.  I tell the young boy of course you must go and check on the boy who fell.  You must shake his hand.

We go to the next block over and work our way through the crowd to find that young boy in the headquarters of a marathon race.  He is okay – no harm done.

Signed,

Kite Flyer

Dear Kite Flyer,

Your dream offers encouragement to you and your endeavors in a couple of ways.  Think of the boys in the dream as different parts of yourself.  Both boys can fly!  

The boy in the air, all bundled up is the part of you that tries to follow the advice of your family, protecting himself from any hazard that might come from flying so high.  But lo and behold!  He flies even with every awkward precaution in place.

The folks on the ground, your family and friends who discourage you, are upset that you even tried to fly and in so doing knock down their assertions that you must protect yourself and not take risks.  The overprotected boy – you – aren’t injured when knocked out of the sky by the more adventurous part of you.

Your Dreaming Self urges you to find him, the trailblazer, and shake his hand – acknowledge that part of you that may be a little like him.  No real harm is done even if you fail (fall), Dear Dreamer.  Just remember that the road to success in your new venture isn’t a sprint, but a marathon.

Sweet Dreams to You!

Dream interpretation - Organize first, then move forward

Today’s dream offers a review for our dreamer – what was and what is before finding what might be.

Dear SMYD,

At one time I taught 5 or 6 yoga classes a week in a very strong athletic and physically demanding style.  Now there are some changes in my life:  We moved to a new town from our home of almost 40 years.  And I have dropped down to teaching only two classes.  They are of the “gentle’ variety for older people with stiff bodies.  People expect more breathing and meditation in these “asana” classes.  Since I am very physical and I prefer gym classes, this presents some conflict.

Now my dream:

I am teaching a yoga class in a big house with many rooms.  The students are in different rooms and I am running around giving instructions.  I tell them to all come to one room, but when they do it’s crowded.  I start to teach, then there is a break and they are in different rooms again.  When I go to a second room students are lounging around on couches and bar stools.  One is looking at his 35mm camera and some photos.  I think- yes!  Teaching opportunity!  "You know how you are so involved with your camera?  This is yoga.  Sustained directed focus." 

It’s almost time for class to end.  I try to gather students into one room, but some students from the first room have left.  Outside former friend/client (who was a teacher and has died) is putting the photos in an album.  I ask, "Will this building continue to be used for classes?  It needs some walls taken down; it has too many rooms.”

Signed,

Different Life/Same Me

Dear Different,

Your dream reflects a natural pause and assessment that you may be going through as you re-establish your life with new parameters.  It presents your ‘teachable moment.’

First, the element of the dream that has you trying to collect students from diverse rooms around the house may be speaking to the idea that you seem to be 'condensing' your practice, both on a literal level - 6 classes down to 2 – and on a figurative level – from the more physical practice of your past to the more meditative practice expected of you now.  These changes are most likely disconcerting or stressful.  This would denote your waking state of mind as you make the adjustments.

In addition, your dream speaks to the place where you are in life now.  With 'sustained directed focus' you are reviewing what has been, (a wide and varied practice), what is (a smaller, less demanding practice) and what might be.  Organizing those photos into the album is a memorializing of your work and your life to date.  Like students who've left the room, some things are left behind.  Your questions to your past (“passed”) friend about what will become of the building might be restated as, “What will become of me?”  Not to worry, Dear Dreamer.  You are working things out!

Sweet Dreams to You!